Out there.

Artists and the art they make are often criticised as being “out there”, as something too lofty and ephemeral for the regular human being, as if creating and creativity were some kind of abnormal activity and art itself a paranormal entity, understandable and achievable only by a select, peculiar few.
And you know what? Perhaps art and creativity is exactly that – out there. When you think about it, maybe we all need to spend a bit more time and energy “out there” wherever is it art is. All these things keeping us from our bliss, our joy, from making the stuff we love, going the places that energise and inspire us, from thinking about the wonder of ourselves and each other are actually very much “in there” – in our own heads.

Continue reading “Out there.”

Everyone is beautiful after I have my Zoloft.

I have a divergent way of thinking, a certain manner of mood, a cyclic emotional pattern with a name given it by the culture I live – “bipolar disorder”. For me, this pattern is sometimes mental illness, because my thoughts and actions can become harmful for me and for others around me. This is the depression phase which can manifest as anxiety, oppressive sadness and pain, anger, and suicidal thoughts. Other times, bipolar is not making me sick, it’s making me a powerful creator. When this is happening, I can literally do anything I think of.

And I can think of an awful lot. Continue reading “Everyone is beautiful after I have my Zoloft.”

The Invisible Power of Creativity

To them, we are invisible. To them, there is only a faceless mass. A huddle to be shepherded. A rabble to be governed. A market to be plundered. To them, humanity consists only of those they have won over, and those they have yet to conquer. They believe their power is the only power; the only path and the only podium. Continue reading “The Invisible Power of Creativity”

Never Let Anyone Sell You What To Do.

We’ve been programmed to believe we have to believe. No, we don’t. You don’t have to believe anything. Not in anything. When you’re convinced you must believe, everything splits into binaries. Everything falls into two categories – what you’re able to be convinced is truth, and everything else. Why not try not believing? Continue reading “Never Let Anyone Sell You What To Do.”

The Myth Of God, Good And Good Enough.

All through my teens and twenties, I was so desperate to prove I was good, and good enough.

Barely a teenager when I became a Christian and gave my heart to Jesus, I was so very desperate to have the deep, horrible feeling of not good enough washed away from me. I hoped to find peace in obedience and surrender, but in the years that followed peace was just as often mimicked in the numbness of substances, or drowned in the shallow desires of others, as it was revealed on my knees at the altar. Continue reading “The Myth Of God, Good And Good Enough.”

How To Move Forward In Your Life Without Blame.

Sometimes in life, when things are difficult or uncomfortable, or someone is being unkind or a dick, it’s necessary for us to choose our way through the situation and out the other side. We need to take stock and personal responsibility, and move forward to bring about change. And that’s fine. In fact, sometimes the only way a positive change will happen is if we facilitate it for ourselves.

But sometimes, everything seems fine and nobody is being a dick, but still we have a feeling it’s time to change. And no matter what we do, we can’t shake the feeling, though we try and pinpoint what’s wrong or who might be doing something to make us feel like we need to go or leave or change things up, we can’t. It can make no sense sometimes, the deep, unsettled feeling we want things to be different.
Continue reading “How To Move Forward In Your Life Without Blame.”

When you can go no further. Begin again.

Every new evolution of your self will come to a place where she believes she can go no further as she is.

And she will be right. She can go no further as she is. She will need to begin again, again.

In those moments, she’ll realize she needs to grow even more, walk even further along the path. The spiritual sojourner never arrives. She honors what was, gives thanks for what is, then greets with joy and confidence what will be.

Every ending is a running into the arms of your Mother self, a looking into the eyes of your Father self, falling back into the love you find, and recognizing God is there, with you, in you.

You are safe and at home with your self, my lovely one. All is well, and you are well.

You can begin again, my love. You can always begin again.