At some point, or at several points along our journey to wholeness and healing, we are going to be confronted with rituals, practices, mind sets, and thinking we used to have, but don’t have any more. And it’s going to challenge and confront us.
Yeah, yeah, you say. Of course I am. If I’m going to be brave, to be a helper, to stay even just a tiny bit in the world of the thing that hurt me, I’m going to come across religious or churchy ways of doing things and I’m going to not want to do them. I’m going to be fine with that. I get it.
Yes, okay, dear one. I wonder if you’re listening? As you journey towards wholeness and healing, towards your gaining courage and bravery, as you move from hurt, woundedness and fear closer to bigness, peace and acceptance, these things you’ve fought to leave behind are going to come into your space. They are going to be around you and you will find yourself having to share space with them. And you’re going to feel things about that.
You’re going to find yourself led or placed or positioned in places with people who have ways of interacting with God that remind you of places you once went and things you once did, and it’s going to make you feel things you don’t want to feel. It’ll be like an allergic reaction, your response will be so strong. And you’re going to want to get out of there.
And this is where it will be important for you to remember the promise you made to yourself was not to run from one way of being afraid, trapped, small and dependant to another way of being afraid, trapped small and dependant, but was a promise to be brave, free, big and independent.
And so, when do you think it is exactly you’re going to need this courage you’ve been rehearsing? When you’re in your safe place? When you’re in your comfort zone with all the people you picked to be with and nobody doing anything threatening or scary or religious? When you’re surrounded by order and safety, that’s not a sign you’re brave. That’s a sign you’re well organised.
You need courage when things are out of your control. You need to be brave when the people you’re with are not the people you would’ve picked to be with, when the people around you are not the students you wish to teach, or the teachers you wish to learn from. That’s when you need to be brave. Otherwise you’re just playing at it.
Courage makes everyone your student, and everyone your teacher. Courage is practical. Not theoretical.
You thought perhaps courage was standing and fighting, and you’re ready to do that, aren’t you? You can outrun them now, and you know it. But courage is also learning to accept and sit with those things that might’ve made you duck and run, because it’s worth it for you to stay. And when you have something to learn, and something to teach, it’s always worth it for you to stay. And you always have something to learn, and something to teach.
You are well, and all is well.
Have a wonderful day, sweethearts.