Don’t Worry About Helping Others.

You’re here on earth to do your thing, your own particular awesome, and that’s all. Your awesome is your work, and yours alone.

You’re going to want to help people with your awesome and that’s perfectly understandable. Most people hope the thing they do will make the world and other people happy and change something, or everything, for the better.

But sometimes doing your awesome, especially to begin with, doesn’t seem to help people very much. It can actually appear to others you’re being very selfish by doing it, and they may claim you’re making them feel hurt or angry or uncomfortable, which could be the opposite of what you wanted, or hoped to do.

Sometimes they’ll be angry or resentful because the thing you’re doing is challenging or confusing them. They may no longer be as sure about who you are, or feel safe around your thoughts, beliefs and values. Sometimes they’ll be resistant to your doing awesome just because it means you’re spending less time and energy fussing over them, and worrying about what they think of you. This can be very difficult, especially if the person who wants you to stop doing your awesome is using dirty tricks like shame and guilt to try and make you stop.

Because of this, sometimes you’ll try to make your awesome into something overtly helpful. Making it into a thing that directly helps others can be a form of validation. But this is too much weight for an awesome to bear, particularly at first. You need to simply do your work, and not worry about how other people perceive it, or what they expect it to do for them, or you. Resist the temptation to redeem your doing awesome by twisting it into a way of helping people simply because it feels self-centred to do what you want.

If you compromise your work by trying hard to make it altruistic or charitable rather than just letting it just unfold into the world and doing it with love in your heart, you’ll have all kinds of problems.

One of those problems will be others finding ways to stop you doing your awesome by involving you in complex strategies they invented to support avoiding doing their own.

Do not allow your beautiful, unique awesome to be manipulated into a rescue strategy for someone with a victim mentality.

Just do it. Make your work. Take your adventure. Be that thing. Whether it helps or inspires others cannot be the litmus test for its worth. Trust in your goodness, and in the love that exists in the place from whence you draw your inspiration. If you do it with love in your heart, it will help people. Your heart is good, so when you do what you do with love in your heart, it is good enough.

Jo Hilder

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